Tag Archives: Steele

He who is handy with Pumice, and other Tales

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lambchop

O Licketysplit! Steele may preside over my table (and so charmingly does he do his napkin folds- like seashells!) but I shall never forget you. After all, it was together that we pelted Culture Club concert goers with melted sweets to test the strength of the candies themselves. It was with you that I huddled under billiard tables or brazenly bore the scrutiny of the police as we cut a sluttish path through the combat zone in quest of snack treats!

I will enjoy Steele’s footrubs and rounds of miniature golf for another week or so, and then my friends may have my attention once more. You really cannot wonder at my current state of absorbtion. He wears cable knit sweaters and gave me ermine socks for my birthday!

steele loves his puppy

smooch

Oh MAN

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Licketysplit

Curse it all, but I have to contend with the return of Steele! I tremble equally with awe at his acquiline profile and with rage at how he wrests my friend’s attentions from me! Is there a scientific name for when girlfriends are unceremoniously swept aside in favor of fresh boy?

Oh Lambchop, remember all our good times? Remember when you got into Yale? Who was there with you, under the bridge in the Public Garden, sipping grape-flavored Mad Dog? ME! Remember the time that drunk guy parked his yellow Geo Tracker in front of my balcony and left it unlocked with the keys in it? Who was right there with you, turning it to face the opposite direction? ME! Who was with you when Nick Cave purchased a YooHoo at Christies? ME!

In case you have forgotten, may I remind you of a picture from our girlhood:

Lambchop and Licketysplit in their Exhibition Days

Doesn’t that tug the heart strings? Mom always liked you best! Now I am going to go and fling myself on my canopy bed, to have a proper be-kneesocked schoolgirl tantrum!

Hmmph!

My Boyfriend’s Back

Uncategorized,

Steele

I am so pleased to introduce you to my better half. For the last six months, generic Steele has been sailing around the Americas. He has just returned today with a marvelous tan and a little sack of worry dolls for me from some godforsaken village where they wear blankets over their heads. I am so happy to see him again! I have prepared his favorite- Pasta Primavera. Steele is a godly man. He has a chin you can stuff quarters into. Each of his locks have been individually kissed by a Florentine hairdresser. He loves Grand Marnier and takes me to every Hugh Grant movie. I am going to run around the room drawing red hearts over each of his pictures. My favorite is this one where he is holding a puppy. Not so much holding it, healing as hugging it.

Here we are vacationing in Ibiza.

lamby and steele poolside

smooch